I asked this hunk out on a date the day before at the shooting range poetry reading. He said yes before delivering his sonnet on the new King Cobra .357:

     "How shall I compare thee to a .44?"

Anyway, he knocked at my door, and I opened it to find him there holding a bouquet of black roses. He said, "Baby, you're looking fabulous tonight." Then he pulled his new Smith & Wesson snub-nose and shot me in the face; actually, the bullet just ripped my right ear off. I fell down, gushing red. He kicked me in the face over and over. He screamed at me for not hitting all the targets at the firing range. When I looked up, he had gotten into his '95 Mustang and had driven off.

Can anyone help me here because I really want to ask him out again.